How Limerence Ends: What You NEED To Know
The short answer
Limerence, the state of being “madly in love” that Dr. Dorothy Tennov named in the 1970s, does come to an end, and learning how it begins and how it ends can help you save your relationship. If your spouse says they’re in love with someone else, it does not have to mean your marriage is over, and there are things you can do to positively impact your marriage.
Key takeaways
- Limerence is the term Dr. Dorothy Tennov gave to being madly in love, and much more research has been done since her work in the 1970s.
- When your spouse says they love someone else, it may be limerence, and that does not have to mean your marriage is over.
- Knowing how limerence begins and how it ends can help you respond in ways that protect your marriage.
- If your spouse won’t work on the marriage, you can still start influencing it for the better on your own.
Here at Relationship Radio, we get all kinds of questions on all kinds of topics related to marriage. The most common questions have to do with a thing called limerence. A word coined back in the 1970s by Dr. Dorothy Tennov, she studied people who identified themselves as being “madly in love”. If you’re reading this, you may be wondering, “I still don’t really understand limerence. How did this happen?” If you want to know all about this state of being “madly in love” and how limerence ends, we can help.
You can go on the internet and find millions of responses about limerence. And yet, a lot of people talking about limerence are merely quoting Tennov. While her brilliant mind opened many doors for the topic of limerence, there’s been a lot more research done since then. Here at Marriage Helper, we’ve seen many situations where limerence is involved. In the last 32 years, we have worked with couple after couple where at least one spouse is involved in a limerent relationship with another person.
If your spouse says, “I’m in love with someone else”, is that a valid kind of love? Is it what people call true love? Does it mean your marriage is over? Or is it this thing that we call limerence?
When it comes to limerence, it is important to learn what exactly limerence is, how it begins, and how it ends in order to help you save your relationship. There are things you can do right now to help your situation so that you can positively impact your marriage.
In this episode of Relationship Radio, Dr. Joe Beam and Kimberly Holmes will teach you all you need to know about Limerence.
If you believe that there’s no way your relationship can be saved, we want to provide you with hope. We have seen thousands of marriages saved that seemed hopeless. Anything is possible. We want to help you in any way we can, which is why we offer a 3-day Workshop for couples in crisis, offered both in-person and online. If you’re thinking, “There’s no way my spouse would do that”, we have ways you can start positively influencing your marriage on your own. We have the Save My Marriage Course which is geared towards the spouse who wants to save the marriage. Learn what you can do right now to help your relationship, while also help yourself along the way.
To watch the video of this podcast, visit our YouTube Channel.
Common questions
Who coined the word limerence?
Dr. Dorothy Tennov coined it in the 1970s after studying people who identified themselves as being “madly in love.” Her work opened many doors, and a lot more research has been done since then.
Can a marriage be saved when one spouse is in limerence?
Marriage Helper has seen marriages saved that seemed hopeless, and has worked with couple after couple where one spouse was in a limerent relationship with another person.
What can I do if my spouse won’t work on our marriage?
There are ways to start positively influencing your marriage on your own. The Save My Marriage Course is geared toward the spouse who wants to save the marriage.