Avoid False Reconciliations: Relationship Radio
The short answer
To avoid a false reconciliation, expect the cycles of feeling close and then feeling your spouse pull back, and don’t give up when they happen. Reset your boundaries with STOPs and COREs, work on yourself through the PIES, and keep choosing forgiveness so you can let go of your anger. Then keep moving forward.
Key takeaways
- Reconciliation often cycles between feeling close and feeling your spouse pull back, and those false starts are a normal part of the path.
- When setbacks happen, reset your boundaries with STOPs and COREs instead of giving up.
- Keep working on yourself through the PIES and watch for any lasting damage to you or your children.
- Forgiveness helps you let go of anger, and guided conversations that focus on the future are what make reconciliation last.
Reconciling a marriage is a long and challenging process and you need to avoid false reconciliations.
You may feel at times that you and your spouse are getting along and becoming close again. Yet, other times you might feel them pulling back.
So how do you handle these cycles of emotion or false starts and avoid false reconciliations?
Today, we look at four steps to avoid false reconciliations when trying to repair your marriage.
We look at the reasons these can occur, how you can reset this path with STOPs and CORES, and use PIES to work on yourself and look for long-term, lasting damage for both you and your children
Forgiveness is a crucial part of letting go of the anger you have toward another person.
Remember, saving your marriage is a winding path full of false reconciliation and setbacks. However, that doesn’t mean you should give up; instead, reset your boundaries and keep moving forward.
Reconciliation, at its core, requires a change from what used to be to what is going to be. And while some of that discussion looks backward, the majority of it is about learning from what happened in the past and refocusing on what the future should be and could be. And then finally, guided conversations are the most powerful part of what makes reconciliation happen and last.
Follow these four key takeaways, and you’ll have an easier time keeping your reconciliation on the right path and avoid false reconciliations.
Reconciliation is optional, but there are many times when it is the best decision to heal the relationship. Especially if there are children involved. Download our free eBook The Ultimate Guide To Reconciliation
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Common questions
What is a false reconciliation?
It is a false start in repairing your marriage. You and your spouse seem to be getting along and becoming close again, and then you feel them pulling back.
Should I give up if our reconciliation keeps falling apart?
No. Saving a marriage is a winding path full of false reconciliations and setbacks. Instead of giving up, reset your boundaries and keep moving forward.
What makes a marriage reconciliation last?
Reconciliation requires a change from what used to be to what is going to be. Most of the work is learning from the past and refocusing on the future, and guided conversations are the most powerful part of what makes reconciliation happen and last.