Here’s the inquiry we received on our website (names removed):
Came across your website, www.marriagehelper.com- I’m reaching out because [casting company] and a major cable network are currently casting a new show looking for monogamous married couples who are willing to participate in a social experiment for a new TV series that will explore the boundaries of their relationship. Wanted to check in to see if you knew any couples who might be going through a crisis or hardships in their relationship and wanted marriage counseling and guidance and might be interested in exploring an open relationship for the first time. If so, feel free to forward this email over to them or share any info on your page. If you have any questions, I’m open to giving you more details.
My Open Letter
Dear Casting Agent,
I am so glad that you contacted us regarding your upcoming casting needs.
I believe that I will be able to help you more than anyone else that you will contact.
We work with hundreds and hundreds of marriages in this very situation every month: monogamous, experiencing marital distress, wanting so badly to find the passion they once had in their marriage.
Time and time and time again, we have also seen marriages that have done exactly what your “social experiment” will be doing –
participating in open relationships.
Let me tell you how it ends. Let me tell you the results you will find.
Not only do countless research studies show the detrimental outcomes of having an open marriage, but we have been the ones that these couples come to because they have ruined their lives by doing this.
The premise of this show is disgusting. It is exactly what is wrong with marriages in America today. Thinking that people should do
whatever makes them happy instead of doing what is right is tearing families apart left and right.
People involved in open relationships ruin their marriages. It might be fun and exciting for a brief period, but over time guilt sets in. Resentment for ever doing it in the first place begins. Self-esteem dwindles to nothing. Mixed feelings develop that lead the person to doubt staying with their spouse. Divorces occur. Children are left to catch the brunt of these horrible decisions.
I don’t know how someone with a good conscience could be affiliated in anyway with this program.
If this is a true experiment, then I sure hope that in your disclaimer to participants you let each and every person know that by doing this, they are ruining their marriage. They are ruining their children’s futures. They are ruining any possibility of a healthy and happy sex life. They will have to live with an extreme amount of guilt, heartache, and regret for what they have done to their families.
So yes, I know many couples who are experiencing marital issues. There is no way I would ever refer them to anything like this.
In fact, you may want to keep my contact information so that you can relay it to all of the marriages that will be permanently damaged with this experiment.
We, unlike this show, will actual save marriages, keep families together, and do the right thing. We will do our mission that we are
proud of and that we can sleep peacefully at night by doing.
I sincerely hope you reconsider this decision.
Kimberly Beam Holmes
Chief Operating Officer
If your marriage is in danger of separation or divorce, call us at (866) 903-0990 to speak with someone or use the form below to request more information about our Marriage Helper workshop for troubled marriages. We can help you save your marriage even in cases of infidelity, loss of trust, anger, sexual issues, and other issues. It cost nothing to talk and we will keep everything you tell us completely confidential. Our motivation is to help you determine if this workshop is right for you and your particular situation.